When was the last time you saw me hiding my feelings? Good question! Naahh.. I was never good at it. There, i just answered my own question. One thing that people might not think i am good at is, I AM A GOOD LISTENER. In fact, i am willing to listen to thousands of stories at a time. Why? Because i realize that our life does not only depends on our own stories and experience. But too much different stories from different people can be very confusing. I mean, it should be the same stories but when the sources of info are different, well.. i know u understand what will happen, right? Still, I didn't say that i could not be a good listener. T__T
I'm quite confuse and my mind is being distracted since last week. Ahh.. I wish that things can be deleted easily. But yeah, even being an amnesian is not a good choice. Dealing with this messy mind can lead me to craziness. God, can u give 1 more chance to start everything all over again? I mean a better one for a brighter life. Wahh! Impossible. I reveal things happening in my life to people, to you, to him, to her, to everybody - i mean through this blog. In fact, too many stories right? Still, not everything are being exposed here. There are certain things that i choose i keep for myself and certain chosen people in my life. Someone always told me:
"You always speak for yourself and came out with your own thoughts when u think it is needed for you to do so.."
Yeah. Because that is who i am. Because that is who i was trained to be. No worries, i'm not as rebellious as u think i could be. Ohh, maybe a little but it depends, actually. Do you know why i always voice out my dissatisfaction and when i disagree with something? Obviously no, right? Here's the answer. When those people see you agreeing in almost every decision they made for you - even for those decision that u think u can actually fight back, they tend to take you for granted. They tend to think that you are not a person they can actually refer to - when your thoughts are actually needed! Especially when it comes to making decisions. Ohh i wish u know how much i hate that. And when u keep following their commands and orders, soon, they will never have respect on u. I mean, they'll step on you and punch and kick you. Well, literally. And trust me, i've been there before. But thank god, it was just for a while until one day, the other part of 'me' told me to change the way i think, act and respond. There! I turned myself to be who i am now. Don't hate me for all the thoughts i have for u, for him, for her, for anyone else. It's true, it might hurt but soon or later u'll try to understand.
And 1 more thing that i've learnt from life:
"Learn to accept others' opinion. Not immediately accepting those opinions. But listen and evaluate. Pick the good one, but don't throw those that u think are bad. Soon or later, it might be useful. Again, listen and evaluate. Use your brain.."